Besides the firm that I work for there are three other tenants on the floor of our building, which means that the other women I work with and I are sharing the bathroom with about a dozen other women total. Now anyone who has ever had to share a common bathroom with other women holds this one thing to be true.
Women are pigs.
Following is what is now hanging on the mirror in our ladies room. It probably won't take much imagination to figure out what led to this being hung up.
To the Person or persons who have been leaving “evidence” of your occupation of this bathroom (and you know perfectly well who you are so don’t just stand there getting mad or pretending you don’t know what we’re talking about):
We do realize that there is a certain freedom in anonymity and understand that since this is not your home you feel that you are not technically responsible for cleaning and maintenance of this room. However, we would like to remind you that the rest of us are forced to share this very small bathroom with you five days a week and would appreciate it if you would please observe the following niceties:
1. Flush the Toilet – No they don’t work particularly well and it frequently requires more than one flush. However, pushing a lever is not a complicated task and if you managed to dress yourself this morning you can probably handle it. Keep at it until everything has disappeared.
2. Stop Peeing on the Seat – If you must hover above the seat like a UFO from the Planet WeeWee, please turn around and look behind you when you’ve finished. If the seat is wet it’s because YOU have just peed on it. Please take a piece of toilet paper and wipe it up. Yes, it’s icky, but there is soap and water available to take care of that. Trust us; it’s less icky to clean up your own urine than it is to clean up someone else’s.
3. Stop Doing Anything Else on the Seat – If, as apparently was the case this past Tuesday, you are having – let’s just say “intestinal difficulties,” please refrain from hovering. On the off chance that you were raised in a field where it was considered acceptable to simply drop your pants and take a crap wherever you happened to be standing and so don’t realize that this is not considered appropriate here, we would like to offer this piece of advice. It’s supposed to go “In” the toilet, not “Somewhere in the General Vicinity of the Toilet.” There is no reason why an adult woman should be shitting on the floor of the ladies room.
As was mentioned earlier, no one else actually knows who you are, but you do. So instead of standing there being insulted or pretending that you have no idea that this is aimed at you, please do the rest of us the same courtesy that I’m sure you expect to have extended to yourself and stop behaving like some sort of farm animal.