Friday, May 9, 2008

I have an excuse !

Yes, yes, it's been two and a half months (thereabouts) since my last post. But in my defense, really crappy things have been happening in those two and a half months and I just didn't have it in me to post anything without sounding whiny.

Thing 1 - My aunt died unexpectedly of heart failure right at the beginning of March. She was my mother's sister and I hadn't spoken to her in about a year because of some things that went on during our last family vacation/rafting trip.

I've had some conflicting feelings. Several people, when I tried to talk about what I was feeling sort of brushed it off and said that it wasn't important and that I should forget it and just stop being angry at her. It's not that easy to just stop being angry though. I gave it a lot of thought and decided that my feelings are still valid. She actually did what I got angry about and the fact that she died doesn't change that.

I loved my aunt. She was a wonderful, thoughtful and caring person. She was also a self-centered, manipulative pain in the behind. I'm sure that I will stop being angry at her eventually and I'm sorry that she died before I got that chance. In the meantime though, I've decided that it is possible to miss her and be mad at her at the same time.

Thing 2 - About a week or so after my aunt died, I got hit by a car. Some woman made a left without checking that pesky crosswalk thing while I was coming home from the train. It could have been a lot worse, I only ended up in the hospital overnight, but I have some torn cartilage in my knee and a small fracture in one of the vertebrae in my spine. Not dangerous, just painful. Apparently it's healing well, but I'm still not allowed to go to yoga or hiking. It's not looking like there's going to be any backpacking or rafting going on this summer. Which is sort of annoying.

That's it. That's where I've been for the past couple of months. It's sucked, but it's getting better. I've been knitting. I've actually finished things, but you can't see any of them because, also, my computer crashed so I lost all my pictures and haven't reloaded them yet.

Yeah. Pathetic.

1 comment:

teabird said...

Good for you - I think you came to a reasonable conclusion about your aunt. You can love someone and still be angry, whether or not that person is alive. You have to be true to your emotions and your reason, and you've done both.

Oh yeah, those pesky crosswalks. (rolls eyes)